December 3, 2024

The Daily Mimic

Satire of the utmost quality and absurdity

Fauci worried that vaccination efforts might wipe out Covid

As the White House announced that the US would have enough Covid vaccine doses to treat all adults by late March, Dr. Fauci warned that the efforts could end the current pandemic.

“I hope the president realizes that if we continue to vaccinate at our current speed, infection rates will drastically drop. That’s a real threat to the ongoing pandemic. If we keep this up, we’ll actually defeat this virus. And that’s a major problem,” said Fauci during an interview with the Young Communists and Socialists newsletter.

Fauci has been adamant in his criticism of scientists and researchers trying to end the global pandemic prematurely: “Without the pandemic restrictions, how are we supposed to control the masses so effectively?” quipped Fauci. The good doctor elaborated on his stance, but the interviewer had difficulty understanding Fauci as he mumbled through the 12 masks he was wearing.

We’ve reached out to the White House, asking why it was willing to endanger the lives of so many Americans by returning their freedoms and livelihoods, but didn’t receive a response by the time of publication.