Trump declares Mar-a-Lago autonomous zone. Appoints himself “President of the President of the United States”
Donald Trump surveys his new kingdom while waiting for the beer girl to show up (politico)
In an act of open defiance against the US federal government, former President Donald Trump declared his Mar-a-Lago resort in Palm Beach, Florida an autonomous zone.
“It worked for those Antifa idiots, why not for someone with my yuge IQ?” said Trump to reporters as he stood behind a massive plywood wall he had erected around the property.
The former president even set up a replica of the White House podium, complete with a hand-drawn crayon copy of the presidential seal.
“Today, I declare this sacred temple to capitalism an autonomous zone fully independent from the US government! The swamp can’t get us in here!”
The business mogul-turned-politician also declared himself the “President of the President of the United States” and challenged Joe Biden to a dual involving “feats of strength and cognitive prowess.”
“It’s the only way to guarantee that we continue to make America great again,” the president declared as a small crowd of grounds keepers and caddies cheered him on.
